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A Reflection on Forgiveness
Forgiveness - What is it?
More importantly - What is it not?
It's not absolution - absolution is between a person and God, not between two persons - only God can absolve - only God can cleanse a person from a wrong-doing.
It's not forgetting. Whoever said forgive and forget was an idiot. You can't forget. The pain is there; the memory's there. You can't just wipe it away.
It's not about warm feelings - feelings are feelings - you can't control them so don't try.
O.K. So what is forgiveness?
It's simply this, not letting the hurt the other person caused us cause us to hurt back.
Forgiveness is the opposite of revenge. Forgiveness is about how we treat another human being regardless of how they treated, or still treat, us or how we feel about them.
You see two people lying in the gutter. One has hurt you badly. Just looking at the person makes all the pain flood back. The anger and shame well up inside you. The other is a dear friend. A person who has brought you healing and is helping to make you whole again. Who do you help up?
Both. That's forgiveness.
Oh, yeah. Treat yourself with forgiveness too.
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